You have to commit to addressing everything that bubbles up.
I have a pretty good relationship with my son and a horrendous one with my daughter, but we raised them pretty much the same.
I was brought up strictly with manners and now parents have greater pressures as well now. But it’s better than fearing that he’ll run away every single day.)
Hi Deb, I am in the same boat as you do.
What you are living through is too much for one person to cope with, so please try to find someone who can help you through it. If you could control your thoughts, wouldn’t you want them to be pleasant thoughts? You have gone through hell and now you are suddenly on your own, feeling traumatised and unloved.
Sometimes we get all wrapped up in ourselves.
But he has always shown respect when at my house he is calm and always follows house rules.
Yes I know that feeling.
As a teen myself, I might be able to see why your daughter is behaving the way she is. Your daughter can be a typical teenager but there must be limits. Things I’ve employed over the past year has been: Live with absolute unprejudiced involvement, evolve beyond your limitations, lead with love and be all inclusive of people you come in contact with. She seems to have turned into a monster.
We all have that choice.
They have a son 12 a daughter 9 and another son 3.
It’s harder for me.
Over 9 months, she barely spoke to me. Stay off the negative. She even said to me recently “why do I make so many bad decisions”.
SOMEONE HELP ME PLEASE. Her sister bore the brunt of her aggression. Suggestions? One minute, everything is great, then all of a sudden I am the devil. If it’s not possible, all we can do is make sure we don’t repeat that mistake going forward.
(even when they hate you)
She saved me from so many negative experiences by having rules and expectations, but she also pushed me away by being emotional and reactive to my teen antics. By commenting you acknowledge acceptance of GoodTherapy.org's Terms and Conditions of Use. I think it’s our job to listen but remain strong in our convictions. Groundhog day! And if you don’t know Jesus, my advice is: find him. My normally happy teen is “icing me out” as others have mentioned. I hope things are better for you.
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When they say they don’t care if you die or not. A friend (also a parent coach) told me “Never ride the roller coaster”. They actually like me, go figure. I find it so hard not to get upset, even though I know this is not helpful. But true, avoiding showing negative emotion is effective. Facing things head on with a CLEAR head. I’m concerned that you don’t have any support.
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We are the creator’s children. Tears are running down my face just reading your story. What home remedies and overnight treatments to use? Be honest with yourself and your daughter about your flaws as a parent.
Do not ride the roller coaster. You went and continue to work to give to your son, don’t give UP. Then tell him that you are also getting the help you need and you 2 are going do this together.
But only lately she will not talk. I have learned to talk to her anyway. Take care and treat yourself to something nice today! Let us know how you are doing. I said because the only thing I ever wanted, the most important thing in the world to me was to be was a good Mom. Also I can pick the destination, choose how long to stay, eat where I want, order what I want, and it will only cost me half as much. This was the worst feeling ever and I hated this part of me. Is it my thing?
One of the biggest life changing things I did was approach any new relationships a little differently. So keep an even keel. You can do it. Life can still be good if we take steps to help ourselves.
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